C.E.O., Gobloc Insulting
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Basic Literature is a corporate satire blog, updated with satirical and humorous commentary on the corporate world, including career advice, management tips, business strategies and marketing tactics.
a satirical blog about our corporate world

10 Best Excuses for Late Arrival

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Oh no! You’re late for work! What should you tell the green monster a.k.a. your boss? Luckily you found this list- the undetectable lies to save you and your sorry career.

Skip this list if you have the skills above..

  1. Stomach/head ache
  2. Traffic jam/accidents in your neighborhood / flat tire / car breakdown
  3. Your shoe’s heels broke off and you have to go back home to change.
  4. One of your children was trying to skip school and you went around looking for them.
  5. Your neighbor doesn’t like your company and decided to sabotage your car.
  6. You fought with your wife after she accused you of being a cheater. You decided not to stay back at the office again.
  7. Acute case of sleepwalking- you woke up some 15 miles from your bed and took some time to walk back home
  8. Being intimidated by a road bully, you had to break down and cry for a while.
  9. You took the wrong turn at a junction and only realize it when you’re back in front of your house.
  10. You’re not motivated enough by your current salary.

Ok, now that I’m done updating my blog, I have a good excuse on why I’ve been late in doing so. It’s because I’m too busy making money consulting my corporate clients to do some ‘cost-cutting measurements’. Of course it’s a funky way to say ‘firing people’.

I’m back to make sure your career is safe. And just so you know, I’ve changed the template of this blog to be more friendly on your eyes. After all, even your company won’t be this friendly to you- not in the state of the current economy.

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