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Basic Literature is a corporate satire blog, updated with satirical and humorous commentary on the corporate world, including career advice, management tips, business strategies and marketing tactics.
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5 Important Gadgets for Executives

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Eying your next promotion? Wanting the pride of finally telling your in-laws you're a corporate bigwig? To get there, you need some gadgets. And these 5 gadgets are indispensable for any executives:

1. Blackberry

This is to confirm to your colleagues and superiors that you're so dedicated to your professional career, you refuse to leave all your work at your desk. You're demonstrating your commitment to the corporate world by having the ability to work even when you're having a loo.

2. Second, cheaper and simpler handphone

You don't want to mess around with your main handphone line, therefore a second line with a second phone is a must. This is important to elude the loan sharks, pay-day creditors, mortgage banks and other collection or repossession personnel from contacting you, since most of your loans are in their delinquent lists. You may blame your small wage increment, but wait till you hear about the allowance cut.

3. Toiletries Bag

You know that even you work your butt all day through all those e-mails, papers and slides, there's always more incoming waiting for you. Yes, when it's time for his tee-off, you being an @55 kisser (we understand, you have to) will take over and finish all his pending task for the day. Which, of course, extend to the night. You need to feel fresh for your midnight coffee outings, or even to start the next day without going back home. Lucky you, toiletries can fit in a bag. Lucky you, toilets are everywhere.

4. Monthly Pass for Bus/Rapid Transit

Forget about owning your own ride. It will only get you out of your neighborhood before massive traffic jams start making you realize your 24 hours are mostly spent banging your steering wheel and cursing the queue jumpers. Public transport is the pride of executives, after all, you still need your sleep there after coming back from the office in the wee morning yesterday.

5. Punching Bag

Come on..after those insults from your boss, the endless grapevine about your lack of taste in fashion, your ire with the mouth of department's secretary, and your uncooperative colleagues, you need something to unleash your fury. And you know your partner/spouse is much more irritated since you always miss your dinner, so the punching bag is a more likely option.

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I guess that's why I don't own a Blackberry. LOL

I probably need one of those before we loose our bed. Live Love Life - Jojo

Vicky, then you should consider bringing your laptop everywhere, including the loo, to produce similar impact.

Jojo, grab them up before you loose everything!

1) and 2) so true :-), i have no blackberry, but have 2 decent Nokias each in different color to make sure I do not make mistake

I have no boss, unless I accept the fact that customer is the boss ... but I have been thinking about that punch bag for a very very long time , need to go and get it and fix it next to my desk :-)

skang ni ramai yg guna 2 handphone sekaligus. satu utk celcom, stau utk maxis. satu handset biasa mcm yg nombor 2, satu lagik handset canggih2. kite gak pakai satu handset je. tu pun handset dah separuh nazak. huhu.

BizGiftGuru, having customers as our boss is twice the nightmare! Customer is the King....of crap that is. Punching bag highly recommended!

Ayumi, speaking of double handphones, public phone is still popular these days- for stalking people that is..

That blackberry is like a ticket to promotion!

ahaks. public phone. lagik "canggih" kan... :p

That's why nowadays there will be more people who will consider their wants as their needs..

Hm..is it really their needs or...

MarketingDeviant, don't forget phony commitment is important too!

Ayumi, public phone will become more crucial with increasing stalkers.

@lienz, we're shifting more wants into needs as time moves on. And more rubbish will pollute our wants at the same time.

Hi Blackzedd,
From now on we have to realize that our life become more simple as OTHERS will decide on our NEEDS and WANTS and possessing the AUTHORITHY to mixed them up!

Mrs.Bean, needs and wants are derived from one's sorry life. The only authority that decides the end mixture is the product of said life.

Beanieville, won't firing bosses diminish any relevance of my post? And, as a matter of fact, all posts in this blog?

u see, nowadays student also use the blackberry. i wonder how they can afford 1.

in my campus, students drive honda, kia, nissan and use n93, dopod while there are lecturers who only drive kancil and myvi, and use nokia 3210.

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