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Basic Literature is a corporate satire blog, updated with satirical and humorous commentary on the corporate world, including career advice, management tips, business strategies and marketing tactics.
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Managers! Observe The Blue Eye System!

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Are you a manager? Then you have to follow the norm- pick a bozo from your pool of subordinates, and treat them as your favorite. Because the corporate management arena work using the Blue Eye System, where you MUST have an incompetent blue-eyed boy or girl.


Why?

You need someone to remind you that you're still in charge
Having someone who nods to your every decision is a great way to do that. Because most of your staff is clever enough to think you're incapable of making any good decision.

You need someone to share your bullshits
Managers sometimes suffer inferiority complex, a state where they're short of distinguished accomplishments to bolster their self-esteem. So are you, so you need someone who nods in excitement to every bullshit you created (to make you feel good)- like the story back then when you were in high schools..

You need the false sense of competency
It's an open secret that you don't have to be smart or competent to be a boss. So you need something to feel like you're one of those competent stars. What is better than having such looser sticking around and praise you all the time?

You need to do less work
The blue eyed boy/girl will go to great lengths in securing this promising position (it can result to promotion, raise etc..), so they'll respond to your every request with 'Your Wish Is My Command'. They'll run all your personal errant. And even fetch you at the airport, which is handy during your midnight arrivals.

*****

Unlike me, I don't have anyone particular as my favorite subordinate. Because I'm so competent, I don't need them. But hey, if there's someone who is more capable than me, they can replace me as the new CEO.

But of course after I struck a deal with them that will leave me a couple of billion dollar richer. Does Golden Handshakes ring a bell?


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3 comments:

Zedd,
I believe I am not the blue eye among my office mate! But I was thinking that there are a lot of negative part being part of them. So, I should be grateful.

Hey
sory to write to you like this, but i could not find the contact form. I really like your blog and i was wondering if you would maybe like a link exchange with my website www.sayeconomy.com . It is not as big as yours, since it isn't up so long yet, but it's gaining visitors fast and i have ordered an advertising campaign recently.

Next to link exchange i would like to offer you an option to publish some articles of yours about economy on my blog, send them to me and i will publish them. You can add link to your blog under each article and i will publish it as a source.

Well let me know on info@sayeconomy.com . I would really like a link exchange with your blog (i like it alot).

Thank you in advance for your reply.

Cheers,
Matt

Mrs. Bean, being a blue eyed boy/girl is like a curse- to their co-workers (like you) when it's time for bonus pay-outs.

Matt, nobody will miss the contact form. Unless they intentionally want to attract spam by posting their unencrypted email address.

BTW, this is a PR4 blog and I assure you lots of those spambots are on their way with my reply.

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