C.E.O., Gobloc Insulting
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Basic Literature is a corporate satire blog, updated with satirical and humorous commentary on the corporate world, including career advice, management tips, business strategies and marketing tactics.
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My Philantrophic Responsibilties Explained...

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Picture for 'illustration' purpose only.

I don't care. Why should I give a damn.

I will not be around by the time the global warming starts melting human eye-brows.

I don't have cancers. And if my relatives have it, it's already too late to find a cure.

Those children who are in need- they're not akin to me in any DNA configuration whatsoever.

Who cares about the forest or the river? Man-made Six Flags are way more beautiful.

Why should I help students who have the greatest potential -to study further and set-up a competing company?

Third World Countries? Why should I share my success with such failures?

Renewable energy? Well, I've calculated that the current energy supply can sustain my funeral needs.

The earth is still largely unpopulated, so why should we go to space?

SO NO...I DON'T GIVE A DAMN. But still, I give. I donate.

That's why all my donations are through the door-sized mock checks- so big it couldn't fit through the teller counter at the banks.

That's why I have to set up a full-blown ceremony to handover my donation. Complete with 5-star dining and reception, and costs the same amount I'm donating.

That's why all those reporters are treated best. Even they don't contribute ANY money to the fund I'm donating.

That's why the cause and the charity foundations I'm donating always related to the areas my business had ill-treated.

That's why I listen to my PR and Accountants before I choose who to donate to.

That's why my charity foundation must bear my full-name.

That's why the amount I'm pledging always correspond the tax figure I refuse to pay.

Sounds fair, isn't it?

Because charity work earns better ROI than paid advertisements.

I will never give away my hard-earned money unless I'll get more money in return.

Investment is not a charity. But charity IS an investment.

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Charity sure is a good way to promote your business. You might make it to the front page of newspaper and popular websites!

Could not agree more. Even for those people who are need to be recognized,need to 'invest'..

Hoho, the question is - How these kind of people can INVEST if they have no money due to their unpopularity??

MarketingDeviant, you got it right. It's so successful that compassion is a new wig for the corporate figureheads.

@lienz, allocation for donation should come straight from the advertising budget. If a company don't have one, maybe they should be on the receiving end eh?

Ya i think charity is also a great way to promote your business.

zedd... am not feeling well... huhu. kesian kan...

Interesting blog, Of course charity great..

Interesting post, charity is a good thing but only as long as the donations go to the right places. All to often I believe business and the green eyed monster sometimes get in the way so charitable donations are therefore being eaten into my commercial running costs.

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